Robbers Snorted Lines of Dead Father’s Ashes Instead of Coke Cocaine

by hearit

Teenagers aren’t also known for making the wisest decisions -- but snorting a few lines of ashes, mistaken for cocaine or heroin, ranks among the dumbest fallacy.

Five “geniuses,” including three between the ages of 18 and 19 and two juveniles, broke into a Florida home and stole ashes related to three deceased bodies: the Silver Springs area house was robbed of an urn containing the owner’s dead father's ashes and a container holding cremains of two large, deceased dogs. The burglars also ripped off electronics and jewelry, but apparently thought they’d hit the Scarface-sized jackpot of cocaine finds. Three factors should’ve serves as a tipoff to the robbers: large quantity, grayish color of the contents, ashy consistency, and the ornate containers storing the “drugs.” All four 'clues' were missed by the teens.

"The suspects mistook the ashes [of one cremated human and two cremated Great Danes] for either cocaine or heroin. It was soon discovered that the suspects snorted some of the ashes believing they were snorting cocaine," the sheriff's department noted.

After the error, the group apparently discussed returning the ashes not snorted -- but instead threw the remains into a lake. The reasoning: the robbers thought their fingerprints may be on the containers. Apparently no one factored in the idea that, if at least than one of the group was dumb enough to suggest that cremated ashes were coke or heroin, that same dumbass might prove a “squeaky wheel” if ever questioned by police.

Someone apparently squealed about the previous burglary, and assisted police with where to search. Police divers have subsequently recovered the ashes. The December burglary remained unsolved until, it seems, one of the group copped to the crime after police caught the group trying to break into another home.