Wedding Includes Lois the Flower Girl that Smells Like a Corpse

by copythis

While every marrying couple strives for a unique and memorable wedding, the Zabala-Smith ceremony is bound to beat all—now slated to include a six-foot-tall ‘flower girl’ that smells like corpses. Jessica Zabala and Jonathon Smith may have inadvertently hit upon the fastest way to slim down a wedding guest list: hold the ceremony adjacent to a rare, blooming "corpse flower".

While no one may object to the wedding nuptials, guests may object to the ceremony’s location and its odiferous and uninvited ‘attendee’. Lois, a rare "corpse flower" ranks as the world's stinkiest bud, unexpectedly blooming right now at the Houston Museum of Natural Science where the museum hosts about 50 weddings per year. Unfortunately, Lois’ extremely short, two-day bloom happens to be occurring in the room directly adjacent to where Zabala will be marrying groom Jonathan Smith tomorrow.

The flower’s corpse-like smell is a pungent one—and travels. "I don't need a florist anymore," soon-to-be-wife Zabala laughs. "I've got Lois."

Technically Lois’ flowering species is the “Amorphophallus Titanium”, a flower that very rarely blooms. In fact the “corpse flower” has only bloomed a total of 29 times in the United States--ever. Texas has been the ‘lucky’ state—getting to witness the “corpse flower’s” bloom a total of two times, including ‘Lois’, but never previously at the museum's Cockrell Butterfly Center.

"I did not know that ‘Lois’ was quietly sprouting in the greenhouse across the street," the bride says—sporting an "I Love Lois" button, so thoughtfully provided by the museum.

‘Lois’ may bloom quietly—but she carries a big stick—or, rather, stink.

Deforestation has left the extremely rare Amorphophallus Titanium flower endangered where it typically blooms in its native tropical rainforest regions of Sumatra and Indonesia. The Cockrell Butterfly Center invested in a $75 "little walnut-sized tuber" of Amorphophallus Titanium about six years ago—the tuber now affectionately known as ‘Lois’—purchased through a Raleigh, North Carolina, nursery that specifically specializes in providing exotic plants.

Apparently ‘Lois’ has been well-tended by museum staff: while many of the “corpse flower” plants bloom only once in their entire lifetime and the plant species is additionally capable of blossoming only after seven years and also a minimum 30-lb weight, ‘Lois’ has been so well-cared for that she’s already blooming.

The rare ‘Lois’ tuber is really paying off—the fortunate part, at least for the museum, its Cockrell Butterfly Center, and the thousands of guests whom are arriving daily for a glimpse of the rare “corpse flower”.

Unfortunately--for the marrying couple and their celebrating guests--the flower’s “corpse” nickname is no joke: the Amorphophallus Titanium flower literally exudes a dead-body smell, nature’s genius method of attracting flies and beetles that the flower must have in order to pollinate.

‘Lois’ the “corpse flower” is just two-thirds of the way to full bloom as of yesterday, with 3,000-4,000 people visiting her daily. ‘Lois’ is slated to only stay open in full bloom for about two days, the corpse smell typically dissipating in roughly 12 hours, Greig says. Dissipation, however, doesn’t appear like it’s going to be a factor in the forthcoming wedding—the “corpse flower’s” current bloom state seems to place ‘Lois’ in full bloom, right on the actual wedding day of Zabala and Smith.

Museum experts initially thought ‘Lois’ would bloom a couple of weeks ago—but apparently that ‘guess-timation’ was a bit off. The butterfly center's director, Greig, was certain that the dead body stench exuded by ‘Lois’ would overtake the Houston Museum of Natural Science by yesterday.

"But she [‘Lois’] has not turned on the [dead body smell] funk yet,” the center’s director says. Apparently ‘Lois’ is saving the “funk” for Saturday’s wedding.

No word on whether the $75 tuber will be turning into a 75% discount for the marrying couple.