Why is there such an epidemic in America of beautiful, sexy women with outrageously low self esteem? We all have a sister, friend, or both that feel less than great about themselves -- often resulting in the constant or lengthy and unhealthy relationships that seem to be perennial. How is the hot sister, who turns heads when entering any room be satisfied (and chasing) a man who is a constant flake, a liar, and can’t keep his member in his pants long enough to stop producing more kids? That would be more kids that he doesn’t support in any regard, financial or otherwise. When the sister looks in a mirror, why doesn’t she see what we all see -- the gorgeous, loving woman who would be a catch for any man?
We all have a friend or two, or maybe three, who are too afraid to speak up or speak out – who refuse to state or defend their own needs, and consistently cowtow to the whims and requests of a partner who forces her to walk on eggshells. She has sex appeal, good looks, intelligence and kindness -- and yet continues to try to sell a partner on seeing “her.”
Like the sister, a friend looks in the mirror and sees only worry, fear, and a good dose of low self-esteem or worth. When family, friends, and strangers of interest find her to be such a catch, why does she not scream from the top her lungs—or become sick and tired of waiting for a “blind” man (or woman) to see her as she truly is? Instead she waits and waits -- but what is she waiting for? What happened to the woman who nearly came off as a bit cocky? Where did she go? Is she deeply hidden inside a manufactured fortress – a fortress that protects and keeps her from change, while locking her inside? From making a demand of what she wants, and what SHE DESERVES, AND WHAT SHE IS WILLING TO GIVE? So, if the answers come -- and they are incongruent with the questions -- does she burst forth, and decide to be free, or does she run back to the safety of her castle and simply watch as the sands of time blow by her?
Is it really the fear of seeking out what people deserve, or is it simply that which is ready for them they are not ready to meet – and instead chasing the unavailable, because it will always remain unavailable and therefore never pose a threat? It may be different in each case, but the commonalities, methods and ways of dealing are so similar that I think it takes surrounding yourself with an honest and loving support system that will be there, and listen to how you feel, but also will ALWAYS BRING YOU UP, up to see the real light of yourself -- even when you are not ready to see or hear it yourself.
To find out more about reasons and causes of low self esteem see the related link from http://www.oprah.com