Planking is so last month. While "coning" and "forking" tried to battle their way to the top in trends -- to claim the dominant position -- it's the "Owling Movement" as the newest trend on scene. It's pretty much what it sounds like: Teens and fools make like a nearly-brainless animal, to look completely stupid.
While planking practices have only recently gained nationwide popularity, the trend's been going on for about two years, starting back in in 2009 -- and originally circulating via Facebook as the “Lying Down Game.” The planking trend garnered fast publicity on video sites like YouTube as bored teens and college students tried to one-up each another -- choosing increasingly high or dangerous spots for planking and filming related videos. The game's become slightly less popular as people have fallen from buildings and had fatal accidents while planking: A young 20-year-old Australian slipped off a seventh-story balcony during his recent planking attempt.
On the less serious tip, late night talk shows have featured guest after guest who's demonstrated 'abilities' in the planking phenom. But others don't see the planking practice -- or the people who try to lay as stiff as a board -- as humorous at all. The rapper Xzibit and and others have gone so far as to dub the game as racist, claiming the body position in planking mimics the requirement of African slaves who were packed onto European slave ships centuries ago.
“Planking was a way to transport slaves on ships during the slave trade, its [sic] not funny,” Xzibit tweeted on Twitter. “Educate yourselves.”
Playing with plastic silverware and food followed the planking trend. First came "Forking" -- the engaging past-time of embedding plastic forks in someone’s lawn. Call it the tee-pee of the 21st century. Plastic forks are less expensive than buying an entire case of toilet paper -- and a hell of a lot easier to remove for the victimized.
"Coning", on the other hand, rivals hot-dog eating contests in its pointless factor: A "coner" buys an ice cream cone at a drive-thru -- then grabs the ice cream cone, basically swallowing it whole, and drives off while leaving the drive-thru employee holding the cone. To up the ante in coning, expert practitioners engage in a fast dip of fingers into the ice cream -- to create 'war paint' stripes. War paint or none, coning is only considered a 'success' if the poor drive-thru employee is stuck holding the cone.
Yes, excitement at it's finest.
It's not exactly a surprise that forking and coning have drifted from the realm of trends. What is a surprise is their replacement: Owling.
Now, it seems, humans want to take after animals. Being human isn't good enough -- it's time to move backward to a less-thinking species -- answering the question as to whether humans have really evolved. Owling involves finding a new "perch" in an odd or high location, while simultaneously adopting an "owl-like" posture. The ultimate goal: snap a quick pic for evidence and post it on Facebook -- or throw a video of the event on Youtube, to officially become part of the "Owling" movement.
Despite reports to the opposite and the sad lack of truth in owls being 'wise', the lie we were all taught as kids, owls are actually dumb creatures. Not only do owls lack intelligence in general, they actually fall into the lower range of intelligence for just birds. It's a sad fact: owls don't even rank high, in the brains department, among their own kind.
It's good to know the nation's moved from imitating inanimate objects to at least live ones -- albeit those with small brains. Watch the video from the kid who claims to be the "Owling King" to understand just how important the Owling Movement truly is -- when you've got absolutely nothing better to do, and are up for risking your life by "perching" on a rooftop.