Getting a free gun when buying a new car just isn't so uncommon anymore – but getting to choose a free gun from a chain store like Radio Shack, and just for signing up for Dish Network -- now that's a free bonus. What'll it be: pistol or shotgun?
Some Montana state customers may be thrilled to know that a sign up for Dish Network packages, at a Radio Shack store in Hamilton, get to choose from a free pistol or shotgun. The options were obviously well thought out: after all, a shotgun speaks loud and clearly, as in stay the hell off of my property and away from my Dish Network or you'll find holes drilled throughout your ass -- or nothing left of it. The more intimate pistol lends itself to a "let's talk about this" type of approach: take one more step toward my Dish Network and I'll have no problem killing you at close range, in "self defense".
Yes, a background check is involved.
No matter what, Radio Shack's gun offer shoots the hell out of Time Warner’s free month of Showtime and HBO. Pizza must also be a big draw in those parts of Montana: for Radio Shack customers not interested in a weapon of choice, they can opt to blow those extra funds on food. How about a $50 Pizza Hut gift card. That’s a lot of pizza. Or a place that has a lot of kids.
Radio Shack store owner Steve Strand claims it took some negotiations for Dish Network to go along with his gun promotion. But spending customers speak loudly, and a good promotion proves to be a good promotion: the Radio Shack owner says business is booming -- tripling since he started those free, promotional guns all the way back in October.
The Radio Shack sign: "Protect yourself with Dish Network. Sign up now, get free gun." Apparently some parts of the U.S. are more concerned with sales than use of grammar. Or, perhaps, all of the nation shares that commonality. The sign certainly gets the point across anyway.
For all the bizarreness, some may wonder why DirecTV hasn’t gotten in on the deal. DirecTV’s television ads certainly seem right in line. Wonder no more: the store has plans to start the same gun promotion next month – this time with DIRECTV packages.
Long live entrepreneurial America!