A Tisket A Tasket A Basket Full of Pocketknives Aimed for the Head

by hearit

One woman and her husband do not mix well with knives, forks–and perhaps not even a spoon. The spoon part still remains to be seen and might be ok as long as it doesn’t involve grapefruit spoons or serrated cutlery. An estranged wife is accused of attacking her husband's head with a "basket of pocketknives" inside a New Jersey home they’d once shared. 52-year-old Kathleen Patricia Shearn wasn’t supposed to be at the house as part of her bail condition in May--when she’d kind of assaulted her husband with a fork.

The couple had been arguing in the house when police say Kathleen Shearn started out on a path of destruction.

Mr Shearn says his wife hit him in the head with a “basket of pocketknives”. As to how one accrues an entire “basket” of pocketknives, to begin with, is unclear – but apparently that basket was available, and it ended up on a collision course with the man’s head. Court records say Mrs Sheam then got in her car and allegedly drove it over the lawn, “tearing up the turf” before leaving – the first time.

Mr Shearn called police – but either his fingers or Springfield-area response time wasn’t fast enough to Patricia Shearn. In the interim, the New Jersey woman returned to the home – with apparently ample time to break an end table over the man’s head before leaving, the second time.

It’s a whole lot of assault within less than a two-month time span. Police say that in May Patricia Shearn threw a fork at her husband that cut open his face. Considering the couple married 12 years ago, in 1999, violence over the past months has been on the rise. After the increased assault rate of late, Mr Shearn may want to consider switching to plastic cutlery – or at least avoid keeping any steak knives on hand.

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